Queer Death Salon is a virtual community space for all 2SLGBTQIA+ people to come together to discuss death, dying and grief.
It is a facilitated drop-in discussion space, with the purpose of building connection, skill, and resources for 2SLGBTQIA+ people navigating end of life in our personal lives and in our communities.
Attendees are welcome to come with questions, stories, or special objects to share with the group.
Body Grief
Tuesday October 6 at 7 p.m. eastern
This salon explores Body Grief, the very real grief that folks experience as we adapt to changes in our body due to illness, injury, and aging.
This is a salon for anyone who
- has endured test after test with little to no answers
- has been given a diagnosis, a pamphlet, and no advice on how to live with their condition
- have to cancel plans they desperately wanted to attend
- is tired of trying to make things work in a world that won’t accommodate them.
During this salon, we will begin with a meditation to allow ourselves to feel rooted and held and to focus on our mind-body connection. Participants will be invited to share their body grief as we reflect on our own experiences, challenges, and strengths as we learn to adapt to our changing bodies. This discussion will focus on our needs on both a personal and societal level as we share our body grief.
Your grief doula, Kirthan of That Good Night, is a Punjabi queer fat femme. Kirthan has lived with PMOS (formerly PCOS) since the year 2000 but wasn’t diagnosed until 2018. She is perimenopausal and lives with frequent migraines, mood disorders, and chronic low energy.
What is remembered, lives
Tuesday October 20 at 7 p.m. EST
You are invited into an experiential gathering to honour y/our beloveds who have passed, sending a thread forward to y/our queer descendants and anchoring into y/our current aliveness.
With ritualized practices, a guided meditation and space for sharing, this QDS is held near many celebrations of death such as Samhain, All Souls Day, Dia de los Muertos, Hallowe’en.
It is also the time of year when death is all around, the land begins to rest for winter before composting for spring. So, let’s follow that cycle of birth-alive-death-birth…..
Everything is optional and there will be multiple ways to engage, including listening/witnessing.
Sharon Pink (she/her) is a portuguese / polish queer leatherFemme witch who lives her time on the territories of the Squamish, Musqueam, Tsleil Waututh and Stó꞉lō peoples.
For the past 15+ years in witch and kink communities, she has led rituals, planned leatherQueer gatherings and much more. She is a Scorpio stellium who has been talking to spirits since childhood and looks forward to Samhian every year.
Using humour, awe, depth and care, Sharon aspires to be in ways that are anti-white supremacy, fat liberatory, gender affirming, leatherQueer celebratory, Elder & crone honoring and sex worker positive.
Connection Beyond Breath:
Living Relationships with Our Dead
Tuesday October 27 at 7 p.m. EST
In this collective conversation, grievers are invited to connect over ways they are or want to be in relation with their dead.
This is not an instructional session but rather a container for folks to share and hear about the variety of ways our dead show up in our lives – in dreams, memories, conversations, spaces, through animal sightings, cultural and spiritual practices, etc. – and how ongoing relationships with our dead can transform how we live, in tough, tender, and touching ways.
Fuelled by years of cultivating relationships with their dead, Case hopes participants leave this conversation both feeling more resourced to build and maintain relationships with theirs, and imagining how we, too, will want to be remembered and connected with when we join them.
“Time is queer and so is grief: grief queers time inexorably. Lose a friend and find how the lines between life and death are also a perpetual spectrum. Who knew loving our dead and naming our dying while trying to survive could be so fucking queer? I would love to meet you here.”
CLICK HERE TO REGISTER FOR UPCOMING QUEER DEATH SALONS
Participants are encouraged to bring their own questions, stories, and complexities to share.
As always, I’m interested in having meaningful discussion groups that engage participants. If there is a question, theme, topic, or guest speaker you are interested in, please take a moment to fill in this anonymous suggestion form. You can submit as many ideas as you like.
Setting and Access:
Queer Death Salons take place online over Zoom on Tuesday evenings at 7p.m. (Eastern Time) and are regularly attended by participants from all over the world. They are hosted in English with automatic captions available and last about 90 minutes.
Attendees are welcome to participate to their level of comfort. This means cameras can be on or off, people can unmute to speak, raise their hand to be called on, participate through chat, or simply listen in after the intro portion. Queer Death Salons are not recorded.
Pay What You Can:
The suggested donation is $30 and you’re encouraged to select a price that’s accessible to you, including $0. No one will be turned away for lack of funds. By paying the highest amount that you’re able, you make it possible for others with less access to resources to join this event. Registrations take lace on Eventbrite which has a minimum donation of $1. If this amount is inaccessible to you, please email us by 5 pm eastern time the day of the event to receive the zoom link for free.
Agreements for participation:
This is a space where we intentionally come together to discuss all aspects about death, dying, and grief. Global events, personal histories, and intimate details of our lives may come up and may bring up strong emotions. Participants are encouraged to do what they need for themselves in these situations.
Racism, classism, homophobia, xenophobia, transphobia, antisemitism, islamophobia, ableism, and any other form of prejudice against a person or way of life will not be tolerated. Anyone engaging in prejudice towards another group member will be subject to immediate removal.
We are curious, open, and respectful – We assume good will, ask questions, and allow space for different experiences and points of view
We take care of ourselves – We stretch, take a break, eat, mute for a bit, drink, use restroom, connect with a friend, rest, call it a night, etc. as needed for our own well-being as individuals.
We keep confidentiality – We speak from personal experience and take home learnings while taking care not to identify anyone other than oneself. If we want to follow up with anyone regarding something they said during a session, we ask first and respect their wishes.
We use inclusive language – We speak using plain language and ask clarifying questions when we aren’t sure what someone means. We make effort to use gender-neutral language as appropriate.
We are all here because we want and choose to be here – We are free to leave at any time, for any reason.
