Queer Death Salon is a virtual community space for all 2SLGBTQIA+ people to come together to discuss death, dying and grief. It is a facilitated drop-in discussion space, with the purpose of building connection, skill, and resources for 2SLGBTQIA+ people navigating end of life in our personal lives and in our communities.
We are all present as community members and participants to discussion and resource sharing. Attendees are welcome to come with questions, stories, or special objects to share with the group. Some months, we may have a guest speaker or a community researcher for all or a portion of a session. Other months, there may be a predetermined topic of conversation for a deep-dive. These will be announced as they are scheduled.
Write Your Grief
Tuesday January 13 at 7 p.m. EST
Participants will be led through a short meditation/reiki offering to ground and center in the space, followed by some intentional and prompted writing time, where we’ll pick a source of grief, or grief itself, and write letters. There will be optional time for sharing about the experience itself or what you’ve written and some additional prompts for continued writing practice. Participants are also invited to submit completed letters to a queer grief zine for publication.
Melissa Delizia, MSW, LSW, DSW (she/they) is a writer, witch, social worker, educator, death doula, and Reiki Master Teacher whose work lives at the intersection of sacred care, social justice, and transformative education. Their practice centers queer and transgender experiences of death, dying, grief, and ritual, with a deep commitment to equitable, accessible, and community-rooted death care.
Melissa teaches social work courses focused on social justice, human rights, and death and dying, and is an educator with La Mort, where she teaches classes focused on death work, queer and trans grief experiences, writing, and energy work. Across their teaching, writing, and facilitation, Melissa is especially interested in how community writing can cultivate ritual, remembrance, and belonging. Their work invites participants to slow down, tell the truths we are often taught to hide, and imagine new ways of holding grief, love, identity, and loss—together.
You can find out more about Melissa and their work on Substack, by joining their writing group, or taking one of their classes.
Teeth Become Weapons:
Trans Grief and Rage
Tuesday February 17 at 7 p.m. EST
Our bodies, lives, and very beings are increasingly politicized.
Our stories and histories are flattened, made palatable for the sake of survival.
Our unique grief becomes increasingly buried and unheard, unshared.
Imogen Reid will guide participants in an exploration of this unspoken (and spoken) grief.
What makes it unique?
What do we grieve?
How does that grief affect us?
What prevents us from engaging with that grief?
How does our grief connect us and bring us together?
Imogen Reid is the last of the feral trans women, a proud dirtbag, degenerate, and fuck up. She is a harm reduction advocate and educator, a former founding member of Communities Organizing for Harm Reduction, one of the first organized groups in Ottawa doing harm reduction before there were any safe sites. Imogen is a recovering drug addict, survivor, fighter, activist, shoplifter, parent, story teller, and the holder of the memories of her dead.
She is a visual artist, photographer, shitty punk musician, and author whose work explores themes of bodies, gender, queer desire, poverty, trauma, drugs/addiction and her own very weird life on this hell world we call home.
Check out some of her work on Instagram and at Sheer Spite Press
CLICK HERE TO REGISTER FOR UPCOMING QUEER DEATH SALONS
Participants are encouraged to bring their own questions, stories, and complexities to share.
As always, I’m interested in having meaningful discussion groups that engage participants. If there is a question, theme, topic, or guest speaker you are interested in, please take a moment to fill in this anonymous suggestion form. You can submit as many ideas as you like.
Setting and Access:
Queer Death Salons take place monthly, online over Zoom on Tuesday evenings at 7p.m. (Eastern Time) and are regularly attended by participants from all over the world. They are hosted in English with captions available and last about 90 minutes. Attendees are welcome to participate to their level of comfort. This means cameras can be on or off, people can unmute to speak, raise their hand to be called on, participate through chat, or simply listen in after the intro portion. Queer death salons are not recorded.
Pay What You Can:
The suggested donation is $30 and you’re encouraged to select a price that’s accessible to you, including $0. No one will be turned away for lack of funds. By paying the highest amount that you’re able, you make it possible for others with less access to resources to join this event. Guest facilitators always receive all proceeds from their sessions.
Agreements for participation:
This is a space where we intentionally come together to discuss all aspects about death, dying, and grief. Global events, personal histories, and intimate details of our lives may come up and may bring up strong emotions. Participants are encouraged to do what they need for themselves in these situations.
Racism, homophobia, xenophobia, transphobia, antisemitism, islamophobia, ableism, and any other form of prejudice against a person or way of life will not be tolerated. Anyone engaging in prejudice towards another group member will be subject to immediate removal.
We are curious, open, and respectful – We assume good will, ask questions, and allow space for different experiences and points of view
We take care of ourselves – We stretch, take a break, eat, mute for a bit, drink, use restroom, connect with a friend, rest, call it a night, etc. as needed for our own well-being as individuals.
We keep confidentiality – We speak from personal experience and take home learnings while taking care not to identify anyone other than oneself. If we want to follow up with anyone regarding something they said during a session, we ask first and respect their wishes.
We use inclusive language – We speak using plain language and ask clarifying questions when we aren’t sure what someone means. We make effort to use gender-neutral language as appropriate.
We are all here because we want and choose to be here – We are free to leave at any time, for any reason.
Queer Community Deathcare 